In today’s world, where interacting with nature seems to bring more danger than ever, it’s amusing but concerning how the CDC is now reporting an alarming spike in emergency room visits due to tick bites. Truly, it seems the age of natural threats is upon us. On top of that, Google—yes, the tech giant—has ventured into the pest control business, seeking the EPA’s permission to release millions of bacteria-treated mosquitoes to reduce disease-carrying populations in Florida and California. Who knew Silicon Valley was now focusing on pest extermination? One might wonder if eliminating these pesky bugs is to save endangered species, or perhaps Google’s just run out of hobbies.
Our trusted EPA Administrator, Lee Zeldon, assures us there have been no recent EPA crackdowns on genetically modified mosquitoes. However, if you’re feeling itchy already, it might be from the uproar these biological plans are causing on social media. Rumors fly faster than mosquitoes, asserting a billion of these genetically altered insects were set free during the Biden administration. However, rest assured, Zeldon asserts that those experimental plans expired and have not been renewed under the current administration. Maybe the thought of high-tech mosquitoes isn’t flying with the American public just yet.
While mosquitoes are causing a buzz, let’s not forget ticks are having their moment in the spotlight too. Current chatter has everyone wondering if there’s a plot to infest farms with ticks to enforce dietary changes—perhaps the work of a sneaky billionaire with a stake in plant-based meats? Our trusty EPA says not so fast. There’s no gadget or gizmo in front of them to tackle ticks at present. So, for the time being, it seems the ticks have free reign to munch on their unsuspecting victims.
Addressing these tiny terrors, the administration steps up, with efforts to take control of the tick explosion. Health and Human Services along with the USDA are co-conspirators in this fight, according to Zeldon. Apparently, Trump’s directive is clear—what matters to millions of Americans matters to the administration. It’s nice to hear that the powers-that-be are gunning for these creepy crawlies. Who knew ticks and mosquitoes would rise to national priority status? It’s about time something’s done to make the outdoors slightly less treacherous.
Now, lest we forget the animals amidst the insect invasion—animal testing. The EPA is advancing new alternatives to animal testing, signaling a cultural shift from the previous dance around rabbits and mice. Judge Piro’s beloved Ridgland Beagles can breathe a sigh of relief. The EPA’s move to phase out such testing marks a win for Fido and Felix everywhere. It’s refreshing to see some concern for animal welfare, transcending political divides. Amid the chaos, it seems the EPA might just be leading the way in both public health and ethical treatment—an accomplishment of note, even if it surprises us.
