As Americans gear up for spring break, they are met with a familiar commotion — TSA lines stretching as far as the eye can see. It seems like a never-ending episode of a poorly-directed line dance. Travelers are twiddling their thumbs, or in some cases, shuffling their feet for up to two hours just to make it past the first hurdle at the airport. With TSA agents feeling as appreciated as a third wheel on a date, many of them have decided not to show up for work. Who can blame them when they are expected to work without pay?
Meanwhile, Congress is locked in their own epic standoff over funding the Department of Homeland Security. Who knew the battle for common sense could be so arduous? Maybe somebody ought to remind Congress that the country’s security is at stake while they dilly-dally over budgetary debates.
While the country is supposed to celebrate the first day of spring, it seems like Mother Nature decided to play a prank. Parts of the nation are feeling the heat—literally. California, the Southwest, and several Midwestern cities are sweating it out with blistering temperatures surpassing 100 degrees. In what seems like a heat wave that’s auditioning for a role in a disaster movie, residents are left dreading what should normally be a season for blooming flowers and frolicking outside.
Across the globe, Iran has decided to give tourism a big thumbs down. It isn’t satisfied with just making missiles in secret; it apparently has a newfound interest in threatening tourism sites worldwide. Somehow, the regime remains steadfast in its missile production, despite taking a beating from U.S. and Israeli strikes, proving once again, bad ideas seem to have more lives than a cat. The Pentagon, not to be left out of this drama, is pushing Congress to approve $200 billion to fund the war efforts, like there’s a fire sale on military spending.
Back on the home front, the President has hatched a master plan to transfer some student loans over to the Treasury Department. It’s part of his strategy to reduce the Department of Education’s influence, starting with defaulted loans worth a staggering $180 billion. This is clearly an attempt to restore some fiscal discipline, though one wonders if anyone will soon need a flowchart to follow the national debt game plan.
In more somber news, the world bid farewell to legendary martial artist and actor Chuck Norris, who passed away at the ripe age of 86. Known for his karate films and for kicking butt on the television screen as Walker, Texas Ranger, Norris leaves behind a legacy of grit and action. As fans around the world remember his exploits, one thing’s certain: Chuck Norris’s legend might just be indestructible. Here’s hoping Congress can channel a fraction of his resolve to finally get things moving.
