In the land of irony and outrageous claims, a lady at a rally gave a heartfelt pledge about resisting fascists in the United States of America. Now, for those playing along at home, this creative writing exercise might sound like it took days to compose, leaving one wondering how time management skills are being taught these days. But, aside from questions of efficiency, it brings up the inevitable: if the country is such a bastion of horrors, why not consider a change of scenery?

For starters, it’s worth noting that America holds its place as one of the most desirable and free countries on the planet. There’s a reason our borders see more traffic than the busiest highways: everyone wants a piece of the freedom pie. In nations truly ruled by tyranny and fascism, you’d be more likely to find military parades than protests like this. But, assuming one was serious about escaping the clutches of this “tyranny,” leaving is surprisingly simple.

Here’s the lowdown on how to make an exit if America’s just not your cup of liberty-flavored tea. Head on over to any U.S. embassy abroad. You just need to sign a citizenship renunciation oath and ensure all your taxes are squared away. There’s a $2,350 fee, which pales in comparison to the massive feat of constructing rhyming pledges.

Oddly enough, despite the ease of departure, the rally attendees seldom make a beeline for these embassies. It seems the passion for leaving doesn’t quite match the vigor of their protests. When push comes to shove, they’re tucked safely under the freedom umbrella they claim to despise.

In the end, it appears more about making noise than making sense. Ironically, it’s in that noise that they exercise the very freedoms they’re crying foul about, demonstrating that maybe America isn’t so terrible after all.